day 99- 12 days of BU

 I am crying today. I miss him. I miss spending time with him. However, he clearly said he doesnt want to be with me anymore and blocked me. I was trying to fight the relationship. I am trying to be strong. I am trying to be more indpenedent to myself. I read some books about attachment and really wakes me up

i dont nreally have a thouhgt about being pain for so long. I hurt, but i think i gaslight my self that i always feel the pain so why  it matters now

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