I admit that I still don't know who I am, what I want, what my value is, or whatsoever about myself. Well, if you want to know someone it means you have to be interested first. That is what exactly I am missing, love myself. I have love to someone else but I neglect to love my self. I barely even consider what I need or what I like. If you already know yourself, you know what to do, you have purpose in life and you are not gonna find other happiness within other people. The happiness relies on you solely.
What does it mean to connect with yourself? Personally, connecting yourself means connecting your purpose in life and why God brings you to this world. As a muslim, my purpose to be a better muslim everyday. How I always worship Allah and avoid what he does not like. I am still far far from perfect. However, I sometimes think I am not a good person and I don't deserve to be better since I am sinning still. The life is actually easy. Don't think about this world and always think the purpose of life is when I am dead. It is short time to live in this world. I am limiting myself if I always think about dunya. I always pray to get married as soon as possible because my friends are getting married while I dont have a certain scenarios about getting married. There is nothing wrong about getting married but getting married because you are jealous of, is wrong. Well, we still live in this world and yes there is nothing wrong to have goals in this world as long as the world is not the solely purpose. My small goal is to know what I want with this life, what my strength that can be useful and my weakness to overcome those challenges.
Why you have to connect yourself? Since I don't know how to be alone, my happiness is tightning to other people's mood. I dont even ask myself whether I am okay. Once the person left me, I don't know what to do because all I think is them; how I can make them happy. Perhaps, I don't trust myself to make my own happiness. Once you find who you are, you have the vibe to attract good people around you since you know what you want, you are not becoming a people please, you have much confidence, you always take care of yourself, you always prioritize yourself, and you can control your emotion better since everyone can influence how your feeling but you could control to choose the right thing to do. If people leave you, you are not gonna sacrifice your self-worth because you love yourself, you know that you deserve love and to be treated with love and kindness. You are going to respect yourself and say" I AM WORTHY"
I have been doing some tips from internet I can share
1. Write down your thought, goals, daily activities
I have been journaling my feeling, what my day would be like, what I like about the day, and everything in my mind. I challenge myself to keep being busy with challenges such as writing. I begin to try new hobbies with paintings and reading mystery and physcological thriller books. It really keeps me busy and keep my interest.
2. Working out/Yoga/Meditation
For me, working out is not helping me boost my physical appearance but also my strength and I just feel better every time I sweat. It does not have to be one hour or going to gym, you can open youtube and follow the instruction for beginners. It makes me more organize with my day. For meditation, I always pray 5 times a day and with reading quran. When I get period, I may just listen to qur'an in my youtube.
3. Accept your feeling
Talk to youurself out of loud about what triggers you, what makes you unhappy, what makes you angry. It helps you to allow yourself being vulnerable with yourself and open and honest about you. You can;t hide thing or supress your emotion. You have to let it out. I am still working on this part, and yet dont expect to be perfect with this routines. The thing is start from simple:)
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